I seem to be resting a lot more than I did during my first chemo regimen. This one makes me feel tired and rundown so I find myself with a lot of time to think when I haven’t the energy to get up and go like I’d prefer. Whilst relaxing the other day, a thought (okay, several) occurred to me.

Cancer is a lot like a tsunami. A diagnosis comes crashing down suddenly and forcefully, knocking someone and their family completely off of their feet. Then the waters flow out into the lives of those around the patient. Shock, fear, sadness, and anger flows with it. But, eventually, the waters recede; the shock wears off and a new headline (good or bad) grabs people’s attention. Life goes on. Calls get less frequent and help is less plentiful. People get swept back up into their schedules and their routines. Everyone is guilty of it, myself included. No one’s to blame. Life stops for no one and we’re all trying to keep up. But what we sometimes forget is that, even though our lives go on, that patient is still caught up in that flood. She’s still treading water and fighting for her life, doing her best to keep her head above water while kicking against the current trying to pull her under.

Cancer is a long, difficult road to have to journey on. It seemingly has no end; sometimes, an end doesn’t actually exist. There are people able to look forward to a cure or remission, people that (although changed by the journey) can move on after cancer. However, there are others who fight every day, continue treatment indefinitely just to keep the monster at bay, balancing symptoms and side effects in an effort to live a normal-ish life. There are patients like myself who may not need to continue treatment for years, but have to cope with ever-present risk of recurrence, anxiety over every scan, worry over any new bruise/bump/pain. We can never return to our pre-diagnosis “normal” schedules, our everyday worries. We may develop a new “normal” but are we ever tired.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that if you’re stuck in traffic or your to-do list is never-ending or your toddler has asked you the same question for the 3198th time, take a deep breath and be grateful. And maybe say a little prayer for those of us who wake up every morning fighting for days like those.

One last thought before I let you go. You can never truly know what’s going on with the people you encounter. Please be kind. Smile and be polite, say “thanks” and “have a good day,” hold the door. It takes very little effort to spread a little sunshine as you go about your day and, if you’re lucky, you might get a little in return.