Some days are harder than others. Gloomy, rainy days when nothing seems to go right and everyone in your house is cranky. Today is one of those days.

I’m supposed to be at the clinic, starting cycle 2 of chemo. But my bone marrow and I are in a disagreement. My body says “no more chemo” and my brain says “too bad, get your act together.” My platelet count is still too low so chemo was pushed until next week (potentially Tuesday). I’m hoping my bone marrow starts producing platelets at a more adequate rate so we don’t have to delay again. Cross your fingers!

If that wasn’t annoying enough, the weight gain that I’ve been struggling with for months has continued. Getting dressed each morning is my least favorite part of the day. I know I’ve got my battle suit on and this is a (hopefully) temporary change. But, when nothing fits, it’s hard to ignore. I’m a relatively small person so any weight gain becomes very obvious. The reality that it will probably continue for the duration of chemotherapy is a difficult thought.

Add to that a child with what appears to be a poison ivy (or sumac or oak) rash and a cat that was just stung by a wasp, and you’ve got the recipe for a pretty rough day.

It’s okay to have a bad day, though. It happens to all of us. Sometimes it’s unavoidable. And in those cases, it’s okay to be a sad or cranky. You just have to make sure that you don’t let it spoil tomorrow. Tomorrow is a new day with its own problems and triumphs.

So, for now, I’m going to let myself feel sad or angry or cranky or disappointed or annoyed. I’m allowed to feel all of those things. But I’m also hopeful that, in the morning, things won’t seem quite so bad and that next week, I’ll get back on track with treatment and just that little bit closer to being finished. I’m going to think about how much fun I had with my family camping this week and keep reminding myself why I’m on this difficult road. I endure these difficult days so that I have many more good days in my future.