Before leaving for Houston, I struggled with thoughts of how the chemotherapy would change me – how I felt, how I looked, how I acted. It made me feel helpless thinking about all these changes that I couldn’t prevent or even really prepare for. My daughter was afraid I wouldn’t be pretty anymore; I was afraid of that too. She and I talked about how hair isn’t what makes you pretty and that being a good person made you more beautiful than any pretty hairstyle ever could. 

It was then I decided to take some control, possibly the only control I would be able to get in this situation. I was going to cut my hair. Cancer may be taking my time, eventually my breast, and my health, but it was NOT going to take my strength or my hair. Hoping it would help my daughter see what a “pretty” person really looks like, I also hoped it would help me feel strong enough to withstand this chemo. I’ve always had long hair so I was incredibly nervous but I will say that I only faltered once after making the decision. I knew it was something that I needed to do, though. 

I mentioned what I wanted to do to a friend, and she ran with it. The day before leaving for Houston, she and a group of my friends showed up for a haircutting chemo send-off party. Armed with clippers, snacks, hats, and jokes, it was a night to remember! I was surrounded by so much love and support that fear had no way in. I am so grateful for the friends I’ve made. I cannot put into words how fortunate I feel.

My wonderful husband also gave up his hair so that I didn’t feel like I was fighting alone. He is my biggest supporter and the only one I want in my corner. If life is a boxing ring, cancer is my opponent but Caleb is my coach. He keeps me positive (and hydrated).

And, hopefully, some little kid will benefit when I send my hair to Locks of Love. Nobody fights alone!